face screws

2020-10-27

We were having pictures done and I was trying on suits. The fit on each one was terrible, far too big, but each one I was convinced was probably fine until somebody pointed out, for example, that the pants were falling off me.

Eventually I got into a suit that fit kind of okay and looked somewhat acceptable.

Then I set about fixing my smile, which involved long nails and screws and anchors that I hammered and screwed into my upper and lower jaw in order to hold my smile in place.

Much like I was unable to get my suit right at first, this took several rounds of inserting a screw, and then removing it and using the proper anchor and screw set. And sometimes I would over tighten a screw in its anchor and it would pull the skin painfully into the anchor along with the screw.

When I was finally done, I looked in the mirror and saw a man in an ill-fitting suit and messy hair with nails and screws jutting out of his face, in obvious discomfort, eyes glassy and face swollen, with a horrible rictus frozen on his face.